El Raton, El Serpiente y el Ropero (The Mouse, The Snake, and The Wardrobe)

So today was my first free half day in quite some time, and although I would really like to be sleeping right now, the Red Bull that I thought was a good idea to drink at 10 am has better plans for me, like writing this blog entry.

The tale I would like to share with you today begins perhaps two or three days ago, when I started noticing a rank, rancid smell in my closet. At the time there was a couple using my room at the Center, so I whiffed my towel to make sure it wasn't moldy, then shut the door and resolved to look for the source later. I went back in the room yesterday and the smell had multiplied like baby rabbits. Feeling embarrassed because there was another woman that I was now sharing the room with, I sprayed some of my body spray and prayed she wouldn't notice. Finally, this morning, which was the first day that I had my room to myself, I brought Ana Francis in to smell it and make sure I wasn't crazy.

Taking one look in the armoire (which resembled a compressed version of how my room normally looks, which I'm sure will warrant cringes from many of you who remember my various disasters of rooms at home, Silver Spring, and in college), Ana used her best indignant voice and scolded me, saying, ¨Amanda, clean this!¨ We determined that the smell was most likely coming from the bottom half of the closet, and that that was where I should start. At that point I started worrying, because I had seen a tiny baby mouse scurrying around my shoes a couple of weeks ago, and thinking that perhaps the mountain of clothes I hadn't washed in nearly a month had somehow suffocated the poor thing.

So, I began throwing all my clothes in wash buckets, desperately searching for a sock that I had left since the beginning of the trip, or the baby mouse, or some pile of moldy tortillas in a bag, anything that would have caused the catostrophic smell that had begun filling my room. In the meantime, I had also decided that I would make this a pampering, spa day, or as much of one as you can have in Nica. I used the trial size Face Masque that my mom had given me before leaving, making my face a goopy white mess while I continued smelling all of the items I was pulling out of my closet. (I was also searching for my nail clippers, which had also somehow been ¨misplaced¨ lol.)

And then, horror of all horrors I came upon it: a reddish, purple garden snake, with its decaying face in a tiny hiss position. I could exaggerate and tell you that the thing was 3 feet long, because that would make this storry better, but I'll stick to boring reality: it was probably about the size of a shoelace, and the baby raton (mouse) might have even been the one who killed it and brought it in. Nonetheless, the point of my story is that there are reasons for everything, including the perpetual chaos I wreak in every room I dwell in, because it looks like the mountain of things I had dropped on top of it was what killed it. Unfortunately, this also meant its little intestines had exploded on my bookbag. Remember, however, that the thing was the size of two pencils put together, and so the excrement only amounted to about a teaspoon. Gross nonetheless, I tell you.

I thought about screaming for the guardsmen to come get it, but then I remembered I still had my face mask on, as well as my booty shorts, which I also haven't gotten to wear in quite some time, so I sucked it up and went to get something to píck it up with, having made sure it was not moving and really dead. I then remembered that I was in Nicaragua, so there are no such things as paper towels, and so I elected to wind up a hunk of toilet paper that was probably the same size as the original roll itself.

Taking a deep breath, I tried to pick up the little bugger, then freaked out and dropped it back upon the backpack, taking the entire backpack outside and flinging the thing into the brush. I tried to wash my backpack a little bit afterwards with another wad of toilet paper, but that turned into pulpy goop, so my backpack is now lying outside my room and I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do with it yet. Hallelujah that there is a fan in my room, because I now have it on full blast and the closet doors open, trying to forget that I have now found both a baby mouse (which I originally thought was a rat because of the word in spanish--raton) and baby snake in there. I don't even want to think about where their parents are...

Anyway, I finished cleaning my closet, whereupon I found my nail clippers (yay!) and painted my nails with the lovely nail polish that my lovely mother brought to Costa Rica for me, during which I listened to All I Want for Christmas is You by Miss Mariah Carey. Slightly out of season I know, but it felt girly and appropriate, as I'm sure Ayshe can appreciate. (We used to drive around with the top down in Harrisonburg about this same time of the year, spreading Christmas cheer in March.)

Also, Memo's sister Reyna invited me to go to the beach with her and her friends tomorrow to Saturday (yay!), so pray for me, kids! I know I said I wasn't going to do it, but I promise if I drink, I'll stay far from the shore!! Can't wait to come back and share the stories with you all, because I'm positive there will be some =) I'm off now to continue my spa day, by boiling water on the stove to wash my hair with hot water in preparation for the trip. Don't be too jealous =)